


BAU Fam

by criminal_minds_addict



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:20:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27938768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/criminal_minds_addict/pseuds/criminal_minds_addict
Summary: Penelope makes a group chat. Chaos ensues
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/David Rossi, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/Emily Prentiss, Penelope Garcia/Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid
Comments: 9
Kudos: 58





	1. The beginning

**Author's Note:**

> My first text fic

Penelope Garcia added Aaron Hotchner, Spencer Reid, Derek Morgan, Jennifer Jareau, Emily Prentiss, and David Rossi to the group

Derek: babygirl what’s this?

Derek Morgan’s name has been changed to “Chocolate Thunder”  
Spencer Reid’s name was changed to “Pretty Boy”  
Aaron Hotchner’s name was changed to “Mom”  
David Rossi’s name was changed to “Dad”  
Emily Prentiss’s name was changed to “Em”  
Jennifer Jareau’s name was changed to “JJ”  
Penelope Garcia’s name was changed to “Babygirl”

Mom: WHY AM I MOM?

Babygirl: because you are the mom of the BAU

Mom: I AM NOT THE MOM!

Pretty Boy: you kind of are Hotch

Dad: yeah Aaron your definitely the mom

Dad: but we see each other way too often why do we need this

Babygirl: for non-work things

JJ: i like this idea

Em: i do too

The group was named “BAU Fam”

Chocolate Thunder: this is probably a bad idea but i love it 

Mom: all of you go to bed it’s 3 in the morning

Babygirl: this is why your mom

Pretty Boy: sleep is for the weak

Dad: no it isnt go to sleep

Em: goodnight

JJ: night

Chocolate Thunder: goodnight

Pretty Boy: night

Mom: good night

Dad: night

Babygirl: night


	2. nobody here sleeps

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek is up late and texts the chat
> 
> also lunchtime chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The dinosaur question was actually texted to me by my friend the other day and the answer Spence gave is what my grandmother came up with

BAU Fam (4:30 a.m.)

Chocolate Thunder: Guys

Dad: why are you awake

Chocolate Thunder: why are you?

Dad: touche

Chocolate Thunder: anyway… why i texted is because i can’t sleep and both Spencer and Penelope are sleeping

Dad: Aaron and jack are sleeping and i was asleep until your text woke me up

Em: GO TO SLEEP!!!!

Chocolate Thunder: dang em why are you so upset

Em: you all texting woke me and JJ up and then Henry woke up screaming

Chocolate Thunder: dang

Chocolate Thunder: well Penelope and Spencer are telling me to go back to sleep so goodnight

Em: YOU CAN NOT JUST RUN AWAY DEREK MORGAN!!

Chocolate Thunder: i can and i will good night 

Chocolate Thunder’s name was changed to Bitch boi

Em: there now i’m going back to sleep goodnight

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

BAU Fam (7:00 a.m.)

Bitch boi: what the hell Emily

Em: i don’t know what your talking about

Bitch boi: my name

Pretty boy: 🤣🤣🤣

Bitch boi: really Spencer

Pretty boi: sorry but it’s funny

Babygirl: it is kinda funny 

Bitch boi: you too babygirl

Babygirl: yep

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

BAU Fam (12:00 p.m.)

Em: did dinosaurs have nipples?

Pretty boy: dinosaurs did not have nipples because they did not nurse their young and were not mammals. Only mammals have nipples.

Em: thanks Spence

Bitch boi: that’s my man

Babygirl: my little genius 😊😘

Pretty boy: Emily you are welcome. 

Em: 😊

Mom: why are none of you working

JJ: it’s lunch mom\

Bitch boi: yeah mom

Babygirl: yeah mother

Dad: kids quit teasing your mother

Em: but daaaaaad that’s no fun

JJ: yeah dad loosen up

Bitch boi: shouldn’t we be telling mom to loosen up not dad

Em: they both need to loosen up 🤣

Babygirl: wait what’s the order of the kids

Em: Aaron and Dave are the parents obviously JJ is the oldest then Derek then me and Penelope and Spencer are the youngest

Pretty boy: Am I the youngest because I’m actually the youngest, because I get hurt a lot or because you all baby me?

Bitch boi: yes

Em: yes

JJ: yes

Babygirl: yes

Mom: yes

Dad: yes

Pretty boy: okay


End file.
